Evil Dead Burn (2026)
Premise: Alice’s piece-of-shit husband dies in a car accident but then sorta comes back. It’s not the best family reunion I could think of, to be honest.
Under 90 minutes? Hohoho, no, it’s almost two hours long.
Do they say the title? nah. They do say “DEAD AT DAWN” but that’s kind of a given with the franchise I guess.
First thing I thought of:
Okay, more: Okay, bear with me. First things first and let’s focus on the positive: there’s a couple of moments here and there with some excellent cinematography, the (mostly practical) effects are really disgusting and some of the kills are really creative. If you like gory movies, well, that might placate your weird appetites.
Now, the problem is that this isn’t supposed to be that, it’s supposed to be another entry in the Evil Dead franchise. You know, the horror comedy franchise with tons of blood and gore but also lots of laughs. The series that is extremely self-aware, knows it is ridiculous and even on its “gritty reboot” (Fede Álvarez’s 2013 Evil Dead) it still was able to wink at the camera when no one else was looking so you’d know it was actually a comedy.
And that’s the problem: this is most definitely not a horror comedy, even though they try to go “haha the grandma’s senile” a couple of times. Nah, it is a really, really nasty, brutal, disgusting, mean film that at times feels hateful and even misoginistic towards its poor main actress. Sure, there’s a market for that but if I want to go for pure disgusting gore I can just rewatch any of the three August Underground movies (I don’t think that’ll happen though). And this is coming from someone who is able to laugh at really dumb gore movies, it’s just…
I don’t know. What a huge disappointment. Excuse the very long rant.
A simple way to improve it: i mean, make it an Evil Dead movie instead of a gorefest for shock’s sake. Also, please do not bring dogs to the party if that’s what you’re going to do with them.
Trivia about the IMDb trivia:
Sébastien Vanicek stated his intention with the film was to, “create a visceral, sensory experience that punches the audience in the gut. I want people to feel physically drained when they leave the theater, like they’ve been through an emotional and intense journey.”
Sébastien Vanicek sees the Deadites themselves as physical representations of real trauma. “The really cool thing with Evil Dead is that you can explore metaphors in a physical way. If you are talking about an abusive husband, you will see that husband as a monster, and you will literally see a monster at some point. That’s the very cathartic thing about Evil Dead.”
N-no, that’s… that’s completely wrong. That’s the literal opposite of what the series is about. Yes, yes I know I said I like the 2013 reboot (where “it’s about quitting drugs” is a theme), but… I mean this is the series where the main character, Ash Williams, is the dumbest (and I mean dumbest) dude in the universe, where things only end up going the right way because he is the protagonist, because good lord the movie lets us know at all points that he’s stupid as hell. It’s not supposed to be a harrowing experience that leaves you exhausted, agh!
