Lords of Chaos (2018)

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Premise: Macaulay Macaulay Culkin Culkin’s younger brother (no, not Kieran, Rory) plays EURONYMOUS, the original leader of MAYHEM in this (very heavily) fictionalized account of how Trve Norwegian Black Metal started back in the nineties! Yeah, you know, the most anime of all metal music genres? That!

Under 90 minutes? Almost two hours
Do they say the title? Yes! And it is the lamest “we’re the Lords of Chaos!” title drop, which made me really happy.

First thing I thought of:

Okay, more: Look, I am very aware of how this one was a bit controversial on release, what with people with zero sense of humour feeling really angry when the movie didn’t take itself as seriously as they take their favourite music genre. I don’t care what those losers think, this movie manages to nail the balancing act where the tone is exactly what it needs to be: this is a story about a bunch of extremely depressed, sad, stupid and violent teenagers that get way way more than they were asking for. At times it is almost scary in how dreadful things feel, often it is hilarious. The casting is just perfect, and also hey they burned some churches and I was 100% hootering and hollering then. Also, our favourite racist sociopath and murderer Louis Cachet hated this movie, so of course that’s another point for it.

A simple way to improve it: my only wish is that Hellhammer got more screentime because damn, that’s a chill cool late eighties metalhead that’s all about party and booze!

Trivia about the IMDb trivia:

Varg Vikernes has claimed that he never had a vest with band patches, never liked Scorpions, never drank chocolate milk at any point from 1991 to 1994, never punched a guy at a bar, never joked about putting all the death metal bands in gas chambers, never has “degenerate sex”, and never was a vegan. But it is true that he was a non-drinker.

See, how can you not find this hilarious?